Tribute to DD
Had a lot of mixed feelings lately. I was ever conscious of balancing the direction of myself in the society. I think nobody have ever noticed my problem, or my faith, except those observant one, which is, maybe David Sugiman?
This problem has its root from my myanmar trip. After that someone had said that kind of things and done that kind of comparison about the different traditions, I had found my way and the teachings to follow (whether i'm diligent enough to follow is another matter lah) and I know that Buddhism would not be the same to me again.
Perhaps no one realise, one of the dilemna i faced when contemplating for the role of president is my personal beliefs. Will i be open enough towards others? I have to deal with other people all the time, do i have to hide my beliefs? Will i be fair in decision making? No doubt i regard myself as capable of all these, telling myself of my roots, if there were no xxx links when i was young, i would not have contact with yyy today.
Back to the title of this entry. The problem was that one slot for dharmacamp could not be filled and although i tried my best to get Ven Visuddhacara, he still could not make it due to his poor health. Of cos, L and WK tried to push for HS, which DD was quite resistant to. I really take my hat off this guy for his firm decision. But i do not understand why didn't he allow me to talk to L about it when i volunteered to, becos i was really worried about the content of the talk if we invite HS. No, not that i have anything against her but very frankly speaking, while DD might be exaggerating a bit when he said 'I learnt nothing', it is certainly true to me that her talk (base on the DC session) was not inspiring and not much Dharmic content. Instead, i feel that the things she shared strayed from my perceive correct teachings of Buddhism. But of cos, that is subjective. The fact that she is someone nice to talk to and makes you feel comfortable is altogether another matter. Oh ya, and i thought i was alone in this evaluation of her till this dharmacamp problem pops up and i realised that there were roughly equal no of people who find her good and who think otherwise. The reason why i thought i was alone is because of the article in the b-digest and someone's blog. I guess it is always easy to fit a conclusion to fit your beliefs, especially when those few feedbacks you got affirm your thoughts. No offence to you L, if you are reading this. It is just an interesting observation i have made.
The problem was sort of solved today, after i confirmed that Ven Visuddhacara cna't make it. The MC decide on HS, with my concerns being addressed and solution being specific instructions being pass on to her, and to make the link to Dharma. DD still express doubts and suggests good alternatives like Peifen. To clarify, the problem of HS is only part of the reason of his reluctance, the other part being the flow of the program. I think the comm was a little insensitive about his hard work in planning. Somehow or another, we still decide on HS. DD have not choice but to go with the decision. Should not really bring up MC matters here, but after reflecting, I realised that I sort of regretted it. There are definitely better choices. I really have no other means to judge HS except for the DC, which of cos, is the thing that is making me worried. After reflecting, i realise that it ironic that precisely i tend twds a certain tradition, in order to balance up, i might have failed to rationalise the situation and analyse it better, and in some sense trying to contain/hide my prejudice... To think about it, i was not rational in going along with crowd in the decision, given my concerns. However the decision have been made and i must learn to respect my comm decisions. Would just like to pay tribute to DD though. I feel that we have a good and firm DD. Just that don't be stubborn ok?
TBC
This problem has its root from my myanmar trip. After that someone had said that kind of things and done that kind of comparison about the different traditions, I had found my way and the teachings to follow (whether i'm diligent enough to follow is another matter lah) and I know that Buddhism would not be the same to me again.
Perhaps no one realise, one of the dilemna i faced when contemplating for the role of president is my personal beliefs. Will i be open enough towards others? I have to deal with other people all the time, do i have to hide my beliefs? Will i be fair in decision making? No doubt i regard myself as capable of all these, telling myself of my roots, if there were no xxx links when i was young, i would not have contact with yyy today.
Back to the title of this entry. The problem was that one slot for dharmacamp could not be filled and although i tried my best to get Ven Visuddhacara, he still could not make it due to his poor health. Of cos, L and WK tried to push for HS, which DD was quite resistant to. I really take my hat off this guy for his firm decision. But i do not understand why didn't he allow me to talk to L about it when i volunteered to, becos i was really worried about the content of the talk if we invite HS. No, not that i have anything against her but very frankly speaking, while DD might be exaggerating a bit when he said 'I learnt nothing', it is certainly true to me that her talk (base on the DC session) was not inspiring and not much Dharmic content. Instead, i feel that the things she shared strayed from my perceive correct teachings of Buddhism. But of cos, that is subjective. The fact that she is someone nice to talk to and makes you feel comfortable is altogether another matter. Oh ya, and i thought i was alone in this evaluation of her till this dharmacamp problem pops up and i realised that there were roughly equal no of people who find her good and who think otherwise. The reason why i thought i was alone is because of the article in the b-digest and someone's blog. I guess it is always easy to fit a conclusion to fit your beliefs, especially when those few feedbacks you got affirm your thoughts. No offence to you L, if you are reading this. It is just an interesting observation i have made.
The problem was sort of solved today, after i confirmed that Ven Visuddhacara cna't make it. The MC decide on HS, with my concerns being addressed and solution being specific instructions being pass on to her, and to make the link to Dharma. DD still express doubts and suggests good alternatives like Peifen. To clarify, the problem of HS is only part of the reason of his reluctance, the other part being the flow of the program. I think the comm was a little insensitive about his hard work in planning. Somehow or another, we still decide on HS. DD have not choice but to go with the decision. Should not really bring up MC matters here, but after reflecting, I realised that I sort of regretted it. There are definitely better choices. I really have no other means to judge HS except for the DC, which of cos, is the thing that is making me worried. After reflecting, i realise that it ironic that precisely i tend twds a certain tradition, in order to balance up, i might have failed to rationalise the situation and analyse it better, and in some sense trying to contain/hide my prejudice... To think about it, i was not rational in going along with crowd in the decision, given my concerns. However the decision have been made and i must learn to respect my comm decisions. Would just like to pay tribute to DD though. I feel that we have a good and firm DD. Just that don't be stubborn ok?
TBC
